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I recently stumbled upon a social media post which posed a question that changed my perspective on trauma and hurt.
When a sneak bites you, do you rush to the hospital or hold the snake who bit you and ask him why he bit you?
We often get caught up trying to understand why someone or something hurts. We end up investing most of our time and energy analysing the motive, action and behaviour of someone or something that hurt us. We believe that if we’re able to make them understand the depth of our pain or why their actions were so damaging, we’ll finally find some sense of resolution.
It is crucial to understand that the more we try to run after the cause to either give or seek explanation, we’re prolonging our healing process. To heal from our wounds is the first step in moving forward, but instead of doing that most of us sit, stare and blame others or oneself for the inflicted wounds or simply run after the one who caused the wound to seek.
In order to understand the healing process, first you need to know what is trauma and how it impacts us.
What is Trauma?
Trauma is a result of a negative event that makes us feel emotionally or mentally hurt by someone or something. Trauma refers to a deeply distressing or disturbing experience that overwhelms an individual’s ability to cope. It can result from various sources, such as physical harm, emotional abuse, or life-threatening events. Trauma can leave long-lasting psychological, emotional, and even physical effects.
Everyone in their lives faces some type of trauma that leaves a long-lasting psychological impacts. Losing loved ones, failing in career, devastation in close relationships, physical abuse, life threatening diseases and more such things can cause deep trauma that needs medical assistance. However, spiritually talking, nature and universe has a cure for all ailments. You just need to start the healing process.
Healing is difficult, it requires challenging, changing and breaking things that stop you from healing. The first step in healing is acknowledging that what happened to you was traumatic. Trauma affects everyone differently, and there’s no “right” or “wrong” way to feel in its aftermath. By validating your own experience, you take the first important step toward recovery.
Another most effective tool that comes in handy in your healing process is the art of practicing gratitude. While what hurts you tends to consume you, you still need to be aware that there are other things in life that has worked out for you. And not just acknowledge it but be grateful for that as well. Practicing gratitude makes you grounded and help your mind be balanced instead of gravitating towards one strong negative emotion that’s generated as a result of an unfortunate event.
Trauma recovery is not linear. There will be ups and downs, good days and bad ones. What matters is that you approach your healing with self-compassion. Understand that it’s okay to feel vulnerable, anxious, or scared at times. Celebrate the small victories, whether it’s making it through the day without a panic attack or simply feeling at peace for a few moments. Every step forward, no matter how small, is progress.
Nurturing your body can be a great way to promote healing. Engaging in gentle exercise like yoga, eating nourishing food, and getting plenty of rest are ways to show yourself kindness and care.
After experiencing trauma, it’s essential to set clear boundaries to protect your emotional and psychological well-being. You may need time and space to process what has happened, and that’s perfectly normal. It’s okay to distance yourself from people, environments, or situations that trigger painful memories or cause additional stress. Boundaries give you control over your healing process and help you protect the progress you’re making.
The only enemy of the healing process is your fear and anxiety. Don’t let the grief in you be the guiding force. Let the shame or guilt or whatever feeling that you have shoved it in some corner of your sub-conscious mind come to surface. As widely said, FEAR has two meaning – Forget Everything And Run or Face Everything And Rise! The only way to healing is facing what has hurt you and from there you’ll find a way back to your true self.
